When a single parent dates, one must have an understanding that the process is not only about the individual but also about what works best for the child. Its about making time for the individual you are currently getting to know and also about managing your time around your child and work life. This is often a hard thing for those who do not have kids to understand when they pursue you.
Many guys can be quite selfish when it comes to dating a single mother because they expect you to drop everything that you have going on at the last minute. The average working single mother requires you to make plans in advance in order to spend time with her and sadly there will not be a lot of pop up visits or last minute plans. As a grown man, you must be able to understand that her time is limited and although she is excited about having someone become part of her world, she knows that her life is not all about her wants or needs.
I have been single going on four years now and I have had my share of let downs when it comes to dating. The average working mother looks at more than just the fact of liking the guy but also if the guy has the potential to be a great father figure to her child. There are so many abusive, perverts and pedophiles out here that a single mother has to be very careful about her choices and any red flags that pop up are a dismiss card for the guy.
A single mother observes how well you respect her time. She is also attentive to your reaction when she states that she does have kids. Be mindful that a single mother will not have you around her kids so suddenly until she knows that the dating will turn into something serious and long term.
When I am dating this is one of my main things that I observe in a guy. I have to know whether this is just a lustful fling going on in the man's head or if he see's me as a potential long term partner.
As a single mother, I do not date for fun. I date with a purpose.
There are so many who just say get out there and have fun because you are single. No as a mother with a child, there is no such thing as dating for fun because again you have a responsibility that will be observing your actions. As a responsible single mother, you can't have different men in and out your door or around your child or kids.
Your actions become their reality as they get older.
Real men know how important it is to be patient. Understand that she is not trying to put you last. If you meet a single mother who is planning and making time in her schedule for you then by all means take excitement in that because it means that she is really interested in you.
Also many of you want to know what are the perfect dates to go on with a single mother. If you and her are going on a first date then just look into doing things that will allow her to relax and exhale. Picnics in the park, hiking, and spa treatments are great places to go because she has been busy all week with her child and work so help her to relax when she is with you. Become that place of peace when she is around you, you know her perfect getaway from her busy life.
If you have been dating consistently for at least three months then plan a getaway weekend for her and her child or kids. She will be observing to see how well you interact and relate with her kids.
I always sit back and observe how a guy responds to my child and his body language when handling things after we have been dating for three months or longer. Your interaction with her child can be a make or huge deal breaker.
I was excited to watch a video put out on YouTube by "Derrick Jaxn" who spoke on how single mothers are only for real men. It was a pleasure to hear a man finally speak out about what single mothers have to encounter in the dating world. If a man is not mature enough then dating a single mother will not work for him.
Dating a single mother is a positive and not a negative. Her pros are that she knows how to prioritize and make time for you, her career and her child. Great signs of a potential mother & wife for you if that's your goal.
Most men think that dating a single mother is a deal breaker when really it is a plus. If you deal with women who do not have kids, many of them can be quite selfish when it comes to their time and could care less about your time.
When I didn't have a child, nobody else mattered but me and I was quite firm about that. It wasn't until I became a mom that I started valuing the importance of other people in my life.
I want to add that no, not all single moms are dating because they need financial help with their child or kids. Many of us are handling our own weight in the home, yet we still need our men to be part of our life. Our desire is to bring our child up in a two parent environment. Not all of us have "baby daddy drama" as many men fear.
Remember be patient with us, always make plans in advance, never play with her time and most of all be understanding when things pop up that might cause a detour in our schedule. If you can do these minor things then you will have a woman on your hand who will truly make you feel like a king.
Lastly do things for her without her having to ask you. It's the little things that mean a lot to a busy mom.
Real men understand that.