Why thinking like a Man failed You & Confused Him!

So guys you have met this amazing woman who seems like she is the best thing to ever happen to you until one day she starts flipping the script on you. In other words her entire personality changes on you. What is her problem? You began to wonder if maybe you have done something to upset her. Let me step in to say that women of all ages, shapes, cultural backgrounds are faced with many issues through out their life from men.

I often hear men speak of how women tend to be crazy and confused about what they want from a man or out of life in general. Almost every young girl grew up dreaming of obtaining her Prince Charming who would come and one day sweep her off of her feet thanks to Disney Movies.  She grows up in hope of meeting that exact guy but soon finds out that every guy is not Prince Charming! 
Women spend hours beautifying themselves to impress men. Men that sadly are very different from each other but all share one common thing which is they have the same sex genitalia between their legs.  She may be thinking what is it that I have to do to earn his love and affection for me over other women. She knows that she has competition out there and simply wishes by any means to gain his heart over the rest. The thing is that she may run into a guy who is simply out to get laid and has no desire to be with her long term because he is simply having "fun". When I say "fun", I simply mean that he is enjoying the freedom of sleeping around with multiple women when he chooses to do so with no commitments to either.  

So along comes little Cinderella with her hopes for gaining his heart and she does everything she feels a woman should do to make this man happy. He on the other hand admires all of her effort but again his mind is still set on simply having "fun".  The woman falls in love and starts confessing her deepest love for him and how she wants to be with him forever. What happens?

Just like that he runs for his life! Why? It's simple. He was not looking for a serious relationship with her. Women have heard that men are simple minded creatures, often their responses to everything is simple context but we as women attempt to diagnose every word the guy says and we assume that he means the opposite of what he is saying. Therefore leading ourselves on to get hurt.

We are out reading books everyday on how to capture a man's heart and still are finding ourselves on the losing end of the stick. Ladies my best advice to you is simple...Listen to what he is saying! Now you may all be thinking that she has no idea what she is talking about because men play games and according to you, all men lie. This is the funny part about those theories. A majority of men are often being very truthful with you from the start. Your problem is that you simply do not listen to what they are saying. Let me give you an example.

A woman meets a guy and he has an amazing body and looks like the perfect guy to be seen walking through the park with, so they exchange numbers and decide to make it happen. The woman asks the guy to tell her something about himself. He simply replies, "I'm a bad boy, you do not want to be with me". She laughs and claims, "You can't possibly be a bad guy". He laughs slightly with her and repeats himself. They go forth engaging in conversation with her still claiming to him that he is being silly and nothing is bad about him. Now let's pause here for a second.

Ladies he just told you that he was a bad guy and that you did not need to be with him. All you heard was what your mind allowed you to hear instead of listening to his comment and taking it for what it was. He is a bad guy meaning, later on chick, I am going to cause you some heartache and let downs because I have other issues which may include other women. So back to the example. The woman pursues him with a mind set on changing this "bad boy" and proving to him that he is a "good guy". Months later he makes a confession to her and states that he has a girlfriend. Her world is shattered but why? Remember at the beginning he told you who he was but you did not listen to him.

Stop trying to diagnose every word he says and just listen to the man. 

One more scenario.  A woman meets a guy and he is attracted to her so they go out on a few dates and she begins to tell him how she wants to be in a serious relationship soon. The guy in return thinks that is amazing but tells her that he is not really looking for a relationship at the time. So she claims to understand and they continue on months of having sex and dining together. She is starting to catch feelings for him and is wondering if maybe he has changed his mind about not wanting a relationship so she asks him about being in a relationship with her. He hugs her and responds again, I am not interested in a relationship with anyone at this time. Her heart is broken, her world is shattered but why? She thought she could change this man with her affection and her body. I will say this situation should have been easy to handle. When he stated that he was not looking for a relationship at the beginning, she should have moved on to another guy who was looking for the same thing that she wanted instead of wasting months and her body with a guy who made it clear at the beginning that he did not want to be with her.

Now here you are hating all men and feeling like your world has fallen apart when you did it to yourself because you did not listen. You read all these books and watched all these television shows for how to handle a man and it lead you no where. The key behind it all is to simply listen to him. His words the first time you meet will tell you exactly what he is about and exactly what he wants. You can't depend on others to tell you how a man thinks, only that man can tell you what he is thinking and all it requires is for you to have open ears to hear what he is saying. You can't always rely on his actions to speak for him because some men are good at manipulating women by using their actions because they also have heard the saying that "actions speak louder than words", so now that you have become so focus on watching his actions...you have forgot to pay attention to his words. The tables have flipped on you ladies, and men are a step ahead of you by giving you exactly what you think you need to see to allow him lesser work to get what he wants from you.

Men are often confused by our actions later on because they are sitting back thinking how they clearly stated what they wanted up front and what they did not want up front, so now when you come crying hysterically and flattening his tires, he is thinking what is wrong with this crazy woman because she agreed to everything I told her at the beginning! 

Ladies you forgot that you agreed to the madness so why are you fighting him when really you should be pounding yourself for NOT LISTENING! 

He did not break your heart...you took your own heart out your chest and handed it over to him with a hammer and said smash this sucker to pieces for the next few months and then move on to the next female. He was not being a dog to you, he told you what the deal was and you did not listen. Now some women might say well there are guys who lead you to think they want to be with you....key word, they lead you to "think" but if he is not leading you to "know" he wants to be with you by means of saying, "Hey, will you be my girlfriend" or "Will you marry me?" then why are you assuming that you know what he means. Again men are simple and more straight forward about what they want than women are. That man may have said to you, "Eventually I want to be in a relationship" and you took and ran with that. Now you feel he lead you on because he said eventually??? That eventually could be 2 to 5 years from now! 

Ladies catch a clue.

We sit back often discussing things with other guys and other females trying to determine what we think the guy really meant when he said what he was saying to you. Your answer is, he meant exactly what he told you, stick with it and leave it at that and if in the future he displays some hurt because you decided to act off of what he told you, then you can feed him his own words so that in the future he is a bit more honest up front.

That man is telling you everything you need to know about him, simply close your mouth and listen more than you talk. At the beginning of getting to know that man, your conversations on the phone should be less talking on your end and more listening to him because that will help you determine whether you are about to waste your time with this man.

Simply Listen Ladies.