It seems that as the years progress, things are changing around more & more. Ive realized the older I get that you cant compare yourself to what everyone else is doing. Alot of women are suddenly feeling like they are under pressure because some men are saying "what you wont do another will"...I simply reply then oh you better hurry up & find her...because I dont like black male. To me if you with a guy who keeps throwing that at you, then its like you being black maled.
I can admit, Im a woman with standards & its some things I wont stand for...I cant lower myself to please a man who is not willing to do the same for me. These young guys are bold & will quickly tell you what they want & could care less & you either got to be down with it or he's going to keep stepping & women you all have to be the same way. Stand your ground & if the guy aint with it, then keep it moving. Theres nothing wrong with standing your ground.
No one likes a push around anyway, someone that moves & changes constantly to satisfy other people but on the inside they are depressed & confused because they are not satisfying themselves.
You have to stay true to you. You cant get lost out there while trying to do whats best for you. You should rather be alone than to put up with someone who doesnt value or respect what you are all about.
Just because Meagan & Jessica are your best friends & they got a man...doesnt mean they happy. Meagan could be getting beat down every night & Jessica may be fighting every other day because her man cheating. Then they could both be in good relationships but you cant judge yourself off what they are doing. Everything has its time & place. While you are alone...use that time to better you & increase your level of love for yourself so that when the right man comes along...they will be thrilled to call you their woman.
Now I do alot of blogging towards women but its because I feel like more of them are lost than the men...but note that this blog can go both ways.
We get involved with people who dont equal up at all to what we are looking for...some treat you like crap & all they have going is a good looking face. Many are ready to fight, cry, & go wild over someone who only has a good looking face & nothing more.
Society is wrapped around keeping up with the Jones. When it should be wrapped around keeping up with what makes you happy. People jump & get married because all their friends & close family memebers are married, or get in a relationship.
You have to ask these questions.
What makes me Happy?
What do I want from a spouse or partner?
And women stop comparing yourself to the female with no morales...I had to say it...but she"s the one who could care less what her man does because she doing everything & more of what he doing, she"s the one down for whatever even if it means sleeping with other women to make him happy, she has no respect for herself or others to include her children...she just is happy to have something hard & rough in the bed with her at night.
You sit up & go nuts trying to figure out "How did she get a Man?". But as i said earlier...you dont know her situation, what she tolerates & has to put up with.
Also dont be so quick to lower who you are because the guy you want, just doesnt want to be in a relationship with you. Doesnt mean something is wrong with you...it just means he"s not ready for you.
Most real men dont want a relationship with a "good woman" if they feel like they havent got themselves together to the point where they feel that they can be called your man. Now true, you may see him 3 weeks later hugging with Meisha...but thats only because he knows he aint got to have much for Meisha to want him, & he'll just play aroung with Meisha til he gets on his feet then he'll come looking for someone he could see as his wife.
You may not understand it all but its really to protect you. Heres a true story of mine.
I was riding in the car from school with this guy I really liked...I started complaining saying...why cant we be in a relationship? You talk to every other female but me...he gave me an honest answer & said..."One, Im not ready to be with anyone, I still cheat, I still lie< & I hook up with those girls because they dumb & dont care about what I do...would you rather me, become your boyfriend & treat you the same way I treat them because if so...then you're not as smart as I thought". I stared at him & literally shut my mouth because I couldnt argue with the truth.
So my point is...Ladies if a guy really cares about you then he wont jump in a relationship with you knowing he's not ready....he's not ready to hurt a woman he respects...he"d rather go do it to someone he doesnt.
Now this may all sound confusing to some but its simple...& men are simple. They give us simple answers to simple situations & you just have to listen because honestly they are more straight to the point than we are often.
Just watch men & their actions. They say what they want & go for what they want...& nothing less. We as women change up everything about us...men dont. They have the mindset of "this is what you get so if you like it then cool & if not then oh well>
Thats why Steve Harvey said Act like a Lady but Think like A Man.
Hope I helped somebody...leave me some comments or questions & I'll respond to the best of my knowledge.
Dueces
-STARR*
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